Can Anyone Make Sense Of This?

Discussion in 'Destinations and RV Parks' started by cannesdo, Mar 11, 2008.

  1. cannesdo

    cannesdo
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    Hi All,

    I've been full-timing for a year. I'm a 41 y.o. woman with an eBay business. I stay a month or two at every stop. I have a 36 ft. Alpenlite. Something happened this week that really left me baffled....

    First let me say that I'm pretty much the "girl next door". Fit, clean-cut, conscientious, kind. I have a college degree. I've traveled a lot solo overseas and I've never had the kind of experience I had this week at a park in Arizona. This woman was really great on the phone, said she'd call me back after seeing what she could shuffle around to get me into a monthly space. And she did, saying there were two people who would likely be out by Monday (this was Friday). She said she'd tell the person there on Saturday that this was in the works and that they were going to try to get me into one of those spaces on sunday or Monday. I was flexible, grateful, complimentary....I asked if I could come down that afternoon as I was excited to see the place (I'd made my first mistake where parks were concerned and didn't feel safe where I was at.

    I walked into the office and it was like I was talking to a whole new person. She was acting really strange. She told me she'd gotten calls, that the spaces were now taken and she stuttered and squirmed whenever I asked about other options (like the space on the hwy she admitted wasn't reserved until May). It was *clear*, a few minutes in, that she didn't want me there. She kept saying "Well, you never know, I might get a call at any time so I can't promise anything (I had to make sure I could get out of the place I was at, but only needed an hour or so to do that.) Man, what a crummy feeling. I've always been well-liked. I'd never experienced that kind of thing. Everyone on the road has been really great thus far and welcomed me with open arms.

    As I was leaving, she suddenly asked if she could ask me how old I was. ? I said "Sure," and told her I'm 41. She looked surprised, and then asked if I had a boyfriend. (What?!) She already knew I was traveling alone, and I told her I didn't, and that I'm not looking for one ;) , that I don't drink, would *not* be bringing anyone back to my rig -- I'm a health nut, and I was just there to take pictures and mountain bike and soak up the scenery. I asked if they had an age limit and she said that no, it was just an adult park and people there like peace and quiet. I said I appreciate that as I do as well, and seek out that kind of park myself.

    Another reviewer (all the rest of the reviews were excellent) said that they were treated well initially, then turned away, told they weren't "their kind of people". He/She felt it was because they had a travel trailer. Well, in my case she seemed preoccupied with my age. Any idea why someone wouldn't want a 41 y.o. single woman at their adult park? I know I'm sort of an oddity in the RV world but most people are interested and supportive.

    I usually don't let this kind of thing get to me, but this did. I just don't get it.
     
  2. denbroncs

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    QUOTE(cannesdo @ Mar 11 2008, 06:12 AM) [snapback]10676[/snapback]

    I usually don't let this kind of thing get to me, but this did. I just don't get it.


    That's a strange one canne. If they were to say, "it's not you, it's me" that would be true. There is obviously something going on that is not quite right. It would be refreshing if they could simply be honest & upfront with you. Perhaps she was banned by Ebay??
     
  3. DXSMac

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    Lordy, I'm 52 but have always looked young for my age. If you had that problem, I would, too! Um..... where, specifically, was this park located???? (What town, etc....)

    JJ
     
  4. Joe-n-Doe

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    Cannesdo,

    Welcome to the community. It is smaller than others, but interactive and informative.

    I think a this is an illustration of why reviews are so important. 2 unrelated reviews spotlighting the same problem should raise some red flags. Not just to single travelers, but to the owners of the park. Seems to me that unless they have posted their policy regarding who and who they won't rent to they are at risk of being sued for discrimination. You might consider doing a record search and see if you can find out who the owners are. If they have a different mailing address send them a letter and tell them about your experience. You might also consider sending a letter to the local BBB.
     
  5. Butch

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    Makes no sense to me, my only thought is that maybe she felt that you were a threat to the status quo within the park as it relates to the males, attached or unattached. Was the park lisited as an adult park, 55 and over, surely something just didn't set right with her, but that's her problem. Her loss.......
     
  6. Beastdriver

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    Cannesdo:

    Something tells me that not being allowed in this park is the greatest thing that ever happened to you. Did you see the really terrible old movie entitled "Motel Hell?" Their slogan was "You check in, but you don't check out." This place is creepy. I would not want to stay there. Will you share the name and location of the park with us so that others can be warned?
     
  7. John Blue

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    We hit the same trick years ago in AZ. Couple parks at check in, person told me in a loud voice you can not stay here. I ask if park was full (place was empty) and he said you can not come here under age 55. I had been in retirement more that a year. I looked at this as a joke but not the check in person. I think some people spend to much time in the hot sun and the old brain in cooked.

    Write this off as life on the road and move on. This will not be the last time you will find a nut case to deal with on the road. AZ is full of very good places to stay.

    Welcome to the group.
     
  8. cannesdo

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    Aw, thanks, Guys....

    I didn't even realize that this site had a forum until yesterday.

    Yeah I tend to look young for my age also. So, that I can understand, but even so, I still look like an adult. And once she knew how old I was, she still couldn't seem to get past it. She seemed to know she was discriminating, she sort of stuttered an acknowledgement, followed up immediately by an attempt to justify her discrimination.

    I'm all for 55+ parks. I'm all for adult parks. All I ask is that they pick a policy and go with it.

    But you know, she knew that I was younger, still working, from our conversation on the phone. I really don't think that was the issue. I think the boyfriend comment is telling. I think it's more about the fact that I was single and female. And that's probably why she was squirming so much. I think she was conflicted about that.

    It occurred to me later that maybe she's got a husband with a history. It could have been as simple as that -- I reminded her of a woman from his/their past. I almost asked her, when it was clear she didn't want me there, if she had any concerns, but I chose instead to try to put her at ease with validation and understanding.

    It is sad when you limit your environment to your own demographic. You miss out on a lot of really great experiences. That said, she has every right to decide what she wants for her own park, and her own life, but the way I was treated just wasn't ok. I hesistated to leave a review as I knew I'd be burning that bridge forever, and plan to return to the Sedona area for many years to come. I decided, eventually, that I didn't ever want to stay there anyway, I didn't even have it in me to call her back, so I did leave a review and shared the whole story. (And wouldn't you know, the paragraph breaks disappeared when it posted so I look like some raving manic loon... :blink: )

    It's hard enough to feel you're not up to somebody's standards but even harder when they come to that conclusion only after they've seen you in person. I guess that's what's got me rattled. I'm usually really good at separating what's mine from what's *not* mine, but I didn't see this coming and I have zero experience with discrimination. I'm a realllllly intuitive and sensitive person. That's why my mind is so blown here.

    *sigh*...This too shall pass. I might contact the BBB though. These people need a wake-up call. I feel like I need to do it for all the other single women out there on the road.

    This was Zane Gray in Camp Verde. It's the nicest park outside Sedona, but also the farthest away (about 40 min to Sedona)

    Thanks, All, for taking the time to respond...this has helped. ;)
     
  9. gwbischoff

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    Um.

    Wow and WOW.

    Inappropriate on so many levels.

    I was thinking, as I read your initial post, that it was merely going to be another "I reserved a space and then got there and they didn't have one" post. But I was floored while reading on.

    I'm in Real Estate here in California, and to this day, cannot figure out how an exclusionary property ("55+ condo,RV park, anything")is permissable. I know it's legal, I just don't know HOW it's legal.

    Now that I've pissed off every AARP member on the site, think about it. Insert any other classification into "___________ only" and you'll have Rev. Al & Jessie, NOW, Gloria Allred (sp)and the ACLU banging on your door.

    cannesdo, do you think it was an age thing or the single-female thing? Either way, I can't think of any place that a person can get away with asking your age and if you have a boyfriend or not? Since you were near Sedona, maybe your aura was the wrong color that day or you were from the wrong vortex or the moon was in the seventh house. Or whatever.

    Correct me if I'm wrong, but they advertise themselves as "Adult Oriented" but it doesn't say "55+" specifically? I believe that it must say that. It can't be "55+ or if we like the way you look, or agree with your lifestyle, or whatever other reason".

    If I start asking prospective tenants those questions, prepare to see a lot of me on the 11 o'clock news.

    (Btw,cannesdo, the "Unabomber"-esque manefesto review style is en-vogue nowadays! :rolleyes: )

    Welcome to the Forum.
     
  10. HappiestCamper

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    I notice on their web site under policies it says "Age Restrictions May Apply". I guess they use that policy when they feel like it.

    Sorry that happened to you, but you seem level headed enough to realize it was just some idiot out there who doesn't know how to run a business.
     
  11. FosterImposters

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    QUOTE(gwbischoff @ Mar 11 2008, 02:32 PM) [snapback]10694[/snapback]

    I'm in Real Estate here in California, and to this day, cannot figure out how an exclusionary property ("55+ condo,RV park, anything")is permissable. I know it's legal, I just don't know HOW it's legal.



    The 55 thing has something to do with "designated housing for older persons". Think there is a property tax break or ? involved.

    Most 55+ RV park communities we've stayed, are large enough that they joyfully embrace all who are a wee bit younger...(future marketing?) Cannot 'rent' a spot on an ANNUAL basis...but we are welcome on a monthly, weekly or daily basis.

    Anyway...welcome aboard Cannesdo! Always glad to have another join our forum! What is your E-bay business?
    B)
     
  12. markfoto

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    In the Sedona area, try Rancho Verde, easy in and out, great family run business. Nothing fancy, but very nice and inexpensive.
     
  13. catman2130093

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    I have occasionally run into much the same thing. At first blush, they assume a single male is likely to be loud, drunk, etc-but I have also gotten sideways glances because I'm a single 52 year old male with no kids or female companion, but I have two cats. They assume I'm gay-none of it bothers me personally, I like rules, peace and quiet, and my two cats are indoor only. I'm clean, my motorhome is 2 years old and most folks assume it's new, and my toad is an 07 Honda. I have no bumperstickers on either vehicle. There's tons of places to see, I reject far more rv parks than reject me-it's annoying when I'm tired and just want someplace to sleep, but I don't let it hurt my feelings. The way I see it, any park should be glad to have me, and you should feel that way too.
     
  14. GROUCHYOLDCAMPER

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    QUOTE(cannesdo @ Mar 11 2008, 04:12 AM) [snapback]10676[/snapback]

    Hi All,

    I've been full-timing for a year. I'm a 41 y.o. woman with an eBay business. I stay a month or two at every stop. I have a 36 ft. Alpenlite. Something happened this week that really left me baffled....

    First let me say that I'm pretty much the "girl next door". Fit, clean-cut, conscientious, kind. I have a college degree. I've traveled a lot solo overseas and I've never had the kind of experience I had this week at a park in Arizona. This woman was really great on the phone, said she'd call me back after seeing what she could shuffle around to get me into a monthly space. And she did, saying there were two people who would likely be out by Monday (this was Friday). She said she'd tell the person there on Saturday that this was in the works and that they were going to try to get me into one of those spaces on sunday or Monday. I was flexible, grateful, complimentary....I asked if I could come down that afternoon as I was excited to see the place (I'd made my first mistake where parks were concerned and didn't feel safe where I was at.

    I walked into the office and it was like I was talking to a whole new person. She was acting really strange. She told me she'd gotten calls, that the spaces were now taken and she stuttered and squirmed whenever I asked about other options (like the space on the hwy she admitted wasn't reserved until May). It was *clear*, a few minutes in, that she didn't want me there. She kept saying "Well, you never know, I might get a call at any time so I can't promise anything (I had to make sure I could get out of the place I was at, but only needed an hour or so to do that.) Man, what a crummy feeling. I've always been well-liked. I'd never experienced that kind of thing. Everyone on the road has been really great thus far and welcomed me with open arms.

    As I was leaving, she suddenly asked if she could ask me how old I was. ? I said "Sure," and told her I'm 41. She looked surprised, and then asked if I had a boyfriend. (What?!) She already knew I was traveling alone, and I told her I didn't, and that I'm not looking for one ;) , that I don't drink, would *not* be bringing anyone back to my rig -- I'm a health nut, and I was just there to take pictures and mountain bike and soak up the scenery. I asked if they had an age limit and she said that no, it was just an adult park and people there like peace and quiet. I said I appreciate that as I do as well, and seek out that kind of park myself.

    Another reviewer (all the rest of the reviews were excellent) said that they were treated well initially, then turned away, told they weren't "their kind of people". He/She felt it was because they had a travel trailer. Well, in my case she seemed preoccupied with my age. Any idea why someone wouldn't want a 41 y.o. single woman at their adult park? I know I'm sort of an oddity in the RV world but most people are interested and supportive.

    I usually don't let this kind of thing get to me, but this did. I just don't get it.
     
  15. Oregon Ms

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    Hang in there, Cannesdo, you're post made me smile and register so I could tell you so.

    I have spent the last 25 years happily enjoying my independence as a solo female camper and traveler in and out of some type of RV or another. You have to admit, we are an exception out there (although times are slowly changing), a curiosity to some of the more traditional RVers (dad drives, mom cooks) in campgrounds and RV parks.

    Can I be straightforward (risky in a first post, I know), but if I'm reading between the lines, you must be an attractive single woman who is confident and happy in her independence. This RV office park woman has issues and as to what they are you and I could have fun speculating all day. Her husband is a philanderer? She's insecure? The last single female patron of her park was a floozie? She objects to solo women travelers on some high moral grounds? She's jealous and enjoys her stature as "queen of the RV park"? Who knows? Just be glad that you got out of there before some unwanted drama was invented. That's the beauty of being on wheels, if you don't like the way a place feels, looks, if you don't like the neighbors....you're out of there!

    Anyway, hello to everyone on this board. Thank you for letting me put in my two cents for what it's worth.
     
  16. P G Winkel

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    We agree with the rest of the posts, the lady has a problem! You did not mention the campground name though, want to make sure we never stay there even if we would fit her idea of okay campers.
    Thank you and have a great day!
     
  17. Texasrvers

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    "You did not mention the campground name"


    Actually she did name the park. Read post #8.
     
  18. rangiebob

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    I thought I'd check into this in case we think about staying in that area. I emailed the park about their ambiguous post "Age Restrictions May Apply" and she responded, "We are an adult oriented rv park, no children." That wasn't good enough for me so I called her this morning and asked if they were a 55+ park and she said "no, we have every age as long as they are an adult. We don't allow children."

    So my guess is that she felt threatened in some way by you, either thinking as others have said that she has issues with single women coming after her man or that you are a lesbian. Either way, her judgmental attitude has no place in my world and I would never consider staying at Zane Grey RV Park. Thank you for sharing your experience.
     
  19. texasturners

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    A single 41 YOA attractive female wanting to rent a spot in a quiet, adult oriented RV community for a month?

    She pegged you for a prostitute. I'm not trying to be gruff here, but there are prostitutes that use travel trailers and motor homes because of the convenience of being able to relocate when things get a little too "warm".
     
  20. RLM

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    Restricted campgrounds exist everywhere. 55+, military only, motor homes only, no pets, no kids, RV age, etc. When used as a market niche, the restrictions are published and obvious.

    I suspect that clerk had been instructed or trained to act that way by the management or the owner. Some people just don't have any common sense. Prejudices can be modified, but "You can't cure stupid."
     

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